1. How Scheduling Time to Worry Can Actually Benefit You

    Worry Less, Stress Relief

    Worrying all the time is a reality for many entrepreneurs. Long hours working alone, increased pressure to succeed and the rigorous demands of running a business often result in concerns that multiply and go unchecked.

    Whether it’s one or two big problems that nag at you consistently throughout the day or a host of little things that zip in and out of your head and break your concentration, there’s one simple way to manage them: take a worry break.

    The Benefits of Worrying on a Schedule

    A worry break is a scheduled time that you set aside on a regular basis to focus on the anxieties or problems that are preoccupying you.

    If that sounds like a recipe for more stress, consider this: spending 15 to 20 minutes a day on a worry deep-dive can ultimately reduce your worries and help you cope more effectively with the challenges thrown at you. When you focus intensely on your concerns at a designated time instead of letting them run wild and interfere with your day, you’re more equipped to create constructive solutions.

    If you’re ready to try a worry break, here’s how experts recommend you start:

    Schedule a time for your worry break.

    Pick a time when you are usually alone and are less likely to be interrupted. Ideally, you would take a worry break on a daily basis, making it part of your routine. This also makes you less prone to skipping it on hectic or stressful days (which is when you need it most).

  2. 3 Assertive Communication Techniques to Earn the Respect You Deserve

    assertive communication, communication skills, communication techniques

    Aggressive people are hostile, adopting the “my way or the highway” stance. Passive people give up their power and are easily taken advantage of, which creates a surefire recipe for burnout and resentment. You want to be a happy medium—an assertive person and assertive communication.

    Assertive people seek out win-win scenarios and make their desires and beliefs known. Confident and assured, they approach situations with a healthy dose of objectivity, and as a result, are able to communicate clearly and directly in a low-drama, self-respecting way.

    Being Assertive is Effective

    One Stanford study found that women who used confidence and assertiveness skills, combined with relationship-oriented traits like empathy, were promoted more often than women who used only relationship-oriented skills. They also advanced more quickly than men.

    Unfortunately, women face barriers to projecting assertiveness at work. Messages from our families, schooling, and society urge women to be likable and agreeable, and this expectation helps create a double bind: If a woman speaks up, she risks being called ”bitchy” or mean. However, if she stays quiet, then she may be overlooked for opportunities or cast as the office pushover.

    Many women have stumbled upon tools like talking sticks or shine theory to get their voices heard. But what’s even more powerful than one-off tactics is developing communication skills to deal with common situations like advocating for your ideas in a meeting, asking for a raise, or managing up.

    Here are techniques for speaking up, pushing back, and getting your voice heard more often.

  3. How to Quit Comparing Yourself to Others

    Stop the comparison trap

    Do you find you’re regularly comparing yourself to others? For example, you’re at the gym, in the middle of a great workout, feeling strong and accomplished. Just as you’re about to start your cool-down, someone gets on the treadmill next to you and cranks the speed up. Their toned legs that go on for miles make yours look, well, stumpy, and you can’t help but notice multiple people staring at her. She’s wearing the trendiest workout clothes, and you suddenly feel incredibly self-conscious in your fitness fashion choices. How on earth is she not even breaking a sweat, while you’re there make-up free and drenched?!

    Back at home, you start scrolling through Facebook. It’s filled with your friends’ happy photos and cheery status updates about the new house they just bought in a super desirable neighborhood. You’ve been coveting a home just like theirs for years now, saving little by little, but your dream is still years away from becoming a reality.

    You start to think, “what did they do right that I didn’t? I should have gotten that raise last year—that would really have helped me out. I guess I’m not putting in enough hours after all, but there is just so much to do between working a full-time job, raising two kids, and dealing with a spouse who travels for work all the time. I’ll never get there…”

    Have you ever found yourself a situation like this?

    This is the comparison trap in action, and it’s bringing you down.

  4. Lukewarm Coffee and Major Mistakes: My Sensitive Striving Story

    One summer Saturday night, sitting at a half-empty Starbucks in NYC, I realized how much my addiction to achievement had taken from my life.

    That evening was rare in New York City—it was the perfect weather to walk in Central Park or have drinks on a rooftop with friends.

    Instead of having fun, I was sitting by myself nursing a lukewarm latte and realizing that I had made a terrible mistake.

    I had just bailed last minute on a close friend’s wedding weekend. My hotel was paid for, travel arrangements were made, and I was excited to see all of my friends from college in one place.

    But the anticipation was always accompanied by guilt. I couldn’t shake the constant reminders from my inner critic:

    “You have work to do. Who do you think you are taking an entire weekend off? What about your career? Everyone is going to think you’re lazy.”

    At the time I was working in a high-pressure job as a researcher. When I wasn’t running around frantically trying to accomplish everything on my never-ending to-do list, I was squished between Wall Street bankers on a bus heading into or out of New York City at rush hour, with a two-hour commute ahead. Every day, I’d wake up at dawn and go non-stop until I fell asleep with my computer on the bed. Then I’d do it all again the next day. 

    From the outside, it looked like I had it all.

  5. What is a Sensitive Striver?

    Sensitive Striving

    A Sensitive Striver is a high achiever who is also more sensitive to their emotions, the world, and the behavior of those around them than most people. Sensitive Strivers are innately predisposed to process information more deeply than their less-sensitive peers. Because of this, they have a heightened stress response. They are highly attuned to their own emotions and the emotions of others. They can pick up on subtle changes in their environment and those around them.

    At the same time, Sensitive Strivers are driven to succeed, and when their sensitivity and ambition come together, it can be a tricky combination. Because they are easily overwhelmed, they often succumb to the stress that is a natural byproduct of their ambition. Common workplace situations like getting feedback, giving a presentation, or even deciding what to eat for lunch are more challenging than they are for people who are less sensitive.

    One Example of Sensitive Striving

    Kelly’s job was killing her spirit.

    When she originally started as social services director at a large county agency, she’d been excited to lead a team and take her career to the next level. The agency’s mission of serving underprivileged children fueled her. All her mentors said that with her drive and ambition, she was perfectly positioned to quickly step into a VP role.

    But, due to budget shortfalls and changes in management, Kelly’s team had been short-staffed for the past three years, which left Kelly to pick up the slack.

  6. Announcing My New Book

    It’s impossible for me to contain my excitement, so I’ll come right out and share that … I’M WRITING A BOOK!!!!

    Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking, Master Your Emotions, and Channel Your Ambition for Success is slated to be published in Spring 2021 by the fabulous team at Chronicle Prism, an imprint of Chronicle Books.

    This team has created New York Times best-sellers like Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck and worked with notable authors such as Paulo Coelho, Marianne Williamson, Rob Bell, others.

    The Official Book Announcement:

    Believe it or not, this book has been years in the making. I started writing the proposal in 2016. I scrapped multiple versions of it – and hundreds of pages – trying to find and refine the idea. 

    With each draft, my editor and agent encouraged me to find the thread that unified my story, struggles, and successes as well as those of my clients.

    And when I dug deep to listen to myself and your experiences, one thing became very clear…

    Our built-in sensitivities and ambition shape the way we view our careers and ourselves. They’re our superpowers. But these qualities can also make us more susceptible to stress, emotional overwhelm, and overthinking that hold us back from reaching our full potential.

    If this sounds familiar, then you may be a Sensitive Striver.

    What are Sensitive Strivers?

    Put simply, Sensitive Strivers are high-achievers who think and feel everything more deeply.

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