Melody Wilding: Today’s episode is for you if you are standing on an exciting professional precipice. Maybe you got the promotion you’ve been working toward for months. Maybe you’re leading a new team for the first time, or spearheading a high visibility project. Could be that you’ve been selected for a stretch assignment that everyone says is a great opportunity.

This should feel thrilling, right? It’s what you wanted, but instead of excitement, you feel nervous. Daunted. Maybe even confused about why this opportunity that looks so appealing from the outside now feels so overwhelming from the inside. You’re standing in your new role, feeling like you’re drowning in quicksand.

Your old strategies aren’t working. The things that made you successful before are now falling flat. You’re starting to second guess every interaction. You’re replaying conversations, wondering if you came across too aggressive, too passive. You know you got where you are because you’re talented. Your confidence seems to have completely evaporated overnight.

You may be dealing with new personalities that seem hard to read, different political dynamics that you don’t understand. Responsibilities that seem more high pressure and more scrutinized. Even though you may feel like you’ve suddenly lost your touch, you haven’t, nor has everyone around you turned difficult to work with overnight.

What’s happening is that the patterns you’ve carried for years, ones that may have even helped you before, those are now working against you in ways you can’t quite put your finger on. I’m joined today by one of our recent Resilient graduates, Amy, who shares her journey through exactly this type of career transition.

Amy is an administrative manager at a major research university who moved from a position where she felt completely at the top of her game to a new role that challenged everything she thought she knew about herself and how she performed. I appreciate Amy’s story because she’s so honest about the struggle, which is refreshing, if you have ever found yourself in this boat. She doesn’t sugarcoat or gloss over the fact that there was a lot of difficulty with this transition. She had a lot of frustration in feeling like her tools weren’t working for her anymore. And the way her confidence took a hit when things stopped landing the way she expected.

More importantly though, she shares some of the hyper-specific changes she made over the 13 weeks she was inside of my program, Resilient, and these totally changed for her, how she showed up at work and also how other people perceived and responded to her. We talk a lot about Amy’s results in the program from her Strive Diagnostic.

That’s the assessment we use inside of Resilient to help our clients identify the one pattern that when addressed, gives them the biggest leverage and best return on their time and energy. So they can stop getting in their own way and instead regain that self-assuredness they may have lost while also gaining more respect, trust, and recognition.

You’re going to hear how Amy used this tool to pinpoint exactly which areas were most out of balance for her, and how focusing on specific patterns created this ripple effect that improved everything else. From how she managed her energy so she could start each day with focus instead of dragging. How she could diffuse difficult personalities, even befriend them and trust her instincts again so she could make better, sharper decisions.

This is exactly what’s possible when you stop trying to fix everything at once and start targeting the patterns that are creating the biggest challenge for you.

Speaking of which, we are giving you a rare opportunity to take the Strive Diagnostic for yourself and get an in-depth coaching intensive so you can pinpoint your patterns and create a targeted plan for growth.

You can get all the details when you join us for my upcoming free event. It’s called 60 Minutes to Defeat Self-Sabotage, and it’s coming up on August 14th at 12:00 PM Eastern. Make sure you have grabbed your spot at melodywilding.com/60 minutes. That’s slash six zero minutes, or just head to the show notes.

During that training, you’ll discover how to identify the number one root cause behind feeling like you’re too much or not enough in your career, and stop wasting time and energy solving the wrong problem. And most importantly, you’re going to walk away with that satisfying click of, oh, this is why I’ve been pushing so hard yet still feel behind and have a clear next step to stop spinning your wheels.

So remember to R svp, that’s melody wilding.com/sixty minutes or head to the show notes. We will see you there. And with that, let’s get into the interview.

Amy, thank you so much for joining me on Psychology At Work. I’m really excited to talk to you. Thanks. It’s fun to be here. Yes. Well, we’re gonna talk a bit today about your journey in Resilient, what you accomplished and more about your story. Before we get there, though, just to orient us a little bit to who you are.

If you wouldn’t mind just sharing just a little bit about what you do, so we know what type of environment you’re operating in. 

Amy F.: I’m an administrative manager in, , a major research university. I work in the dean’s office, so I, work in very faculty and department facing structures and do a lot of management behind the scenes.

Making things happen. 

Melody Wilding: Being someone who works in the university environment. Thank God for people like you who make all of the things work and all of the things happen so well with that. Tell me what brought you to Resilient? What was happening in your career within yourself?

What were you struggling with? 

Amy F.: I had recently moved from a position where I felt really comfortable and at the top of my game. , But I wasn’t feeling challenged in all the ways that I wanted to be challenged. So I had taken a new position and I was like, sure, this is gonna be a big challenge.

And at that point I was standing up in office and I was interacting with an entirely. New set of people, colleagues, people I knew but had never worked with closely, , and in a different part of the university where there was a different kind of culture. So it was a culture shift and I began to feel one, some sense of isolation just because my work environment had changed.

I didn’t have my usual, , colleagues to, , talk with and all of that. And, , I was standing up in office so that there were a lot of challenging work pieces to do. . Then the last part of it was, is when I did interact with people, I felt like I no longer had the tools and the tool. I mean, I had tools in the toolbox, they just weren’t the right tools or they weren’t working for me anymore.

And that part was really frustrating because I was trying to deal with new personalities, new political dynamics, new culture for me, and my tools were just. Like not serving me. I was really starting to feel frustrated because I was trying to rapidly acquire all this information and do my job well, and also somehow diagnose all the other things that were happening and try to figure out how to solve those things too.

And it was just too much. It became overwhelming. 

I looked at a bunch of different options. I was, it was one of those things where like I would go online and I would like Google this problem and this problem, and what can I read today from HBR, and I think I stumbled across an article that you had written, either it had been posted on LinkedIn or it was in Harvard Business Review

, And I thought, wow, this makes a lot of sense. . And then I came across your website and I started digging into this and thought, wow, I really need something that’s more comprehensive. And our learning environment for our employees did not have something like this.

And so I just thought, this is what I need . . 

Melody Wilding: , I just wanna go back to the transition you were navigating through. ’cause I think a lot of people find themselves in this tension of, I’m excited for this bigger opportunity. We’re, we’re sensitive strivers after all. , We’re driven to grow and take on bigger things.

See through our potential. Right. Not necessarily because we wanna climb the ladder, we want the, the accolades and the title in the corner office, I’m sure you took it because it was an exciting challenge. It was, , it was a chance to make a bigger impact to show yourself what you were made of, but at the same time.

It starts to come with trepidation or fear or second guessing. There’s this tension there that I want this, but I’m intimidated by this. And it sounds like you experienced , the phenomenon that I see often, which is new level. Same devil, but in different clothes. . Sometimes there same insecurities or hangups or , even things we’ve struggled with in the past, you were saying I, I had tools to deal with them, but now there’s new nuances.

There’s new personalities involved. This is at a different scope and scale than I might have dealt with before. For the person who’s listening that finds themselves there right now. , What were you noticing day to day that you said, my tools aren’t working for me anymore? . Whether it was what you were experiencing, it was in your relationships, how did you, how did you know?

Amy F.: One of the things from the outset was, a lack of confidence, right? I am a strategic risk taker and I really, it’s actually my perceptiveness and my risk taking is what I do really well. , when we think about the strive , diagnostic that comes with the training, those were like my high points.

Um, and so I was able to like, think through things and be willing to take the risks like taking this transition, taking this job. . What was happening was that how I would communicate was not, it wasn’t landing right? . I might try to strategize about how to shape this and then, then that would not work out or I would change how I was working with this personality, I wasn’t able to quite pin the personality.

So a lot of the communication was where I first started noticing things weren’t landing the way that I wanted them to land. I was not in real time being able to make adjustments or , I was getting feedback that. Was giving me information of , perceptions from others about myself., That kind of led to lack of confidence.

Suddenly I started doubting my instincts because I was thinking, gosh, none of this is like really hitting the mark. And I was feeling like I was playing whack-a-mole a little bit with it. And then I started to think that there was something wrong with me. Well. In the end, it’s not really that there’s anything wrong with me, it was that I needed to understand myself better so that I could understand my world and communicate differently with my world.

When I started to figure that out. That’s where I knew, okay, now I can begin to diagnose and like sort of walk it out. But it was really the communication that was the first red flag for me , and the frustration too, like I love. What I do, and I have always done this , always been in higher ed, always worked in education, love working with students and faculty, and I started to feel really frustrated and down about coming to work and I realized it was because I was frustrated with the day to day , issues.

It wasn’t the work itself. that had to be fixed if I was gonna continue to stay passionate about it. 

Melody Wilding: Such a great point. You were, you were referring to the Strive diagnostic, which is the tool we use inside of the program to. Look at you as a sensitive striver, your six high level traits, things like sensitivity, thoughtfulness, responsibility, inner drive, vigilance, emotionality.

And within those we have three components within each. And you were talking about diagnosing the problem, and that’s what that assessment helps you do is really zero in on this is the lever or this is the area where I’m most unbalanced and in preparation for this conversation, I went back, I looked at your diagnostic results from the time you were in Resilient, because you take it at the beginning, the midpoint.

And the end of the program. And I wanted to unpack some of your results because they’re pretty remarkable. And from a high level overall. Across all of the qualities, your scores increased from 49% to 68% in just that 13 weeks you were in the program. When you think back on that time and that journey that you were taking from 49% balanced to 68% balanced, what are some of the most significant changes that you noticed in yourself 

Amy F.: I became more assertive I’ve been decisive, but there’s a difference between being decisive and being assertive. So I became more assertive around boundary settings because I needed to work on the things that were my lowest points, which was energy management. I had to really learn how to do that and communicate that well.

My biggest takeaway was how all of these things integrate. You can imagine it as a web. I imagine it as one of those, toys that has, like a hexagon and it’s stretchy and it all hinges, and so you pull it on one side and it stretches to a different shape.

You push and pull, so when you put stress on something, the other stuff is gonna get stretched too. And so I was realizing like the harmony, right? We talk about that. Keeping all of those things somewhat in balance is really the key. Improving in one area is actually gonna make improvements in other areas.

I didn’t feel like I had to only focus on one thing and then everything else would get set off to the side. My , super achiever person was like energized by the fact that I could make incremental changes here and there and all the things would be better.

Melody Wilding: We usually see that rising tide lifts all boats effect because as you were saying it, it is hard to tease these things out because, for example, we’ll talk about energy management more in just a second. If your energy management is better balanced, well then that’s gonna give you more ability to go after maybe some of the components in inner drive that are things like aligned ambition or strategic risk taking.

You have more ability to focus and, and mental where exactly to go after that. So yes, they, they definitely play within each other and that, that’s part of, the beauty and the advantage of doing this work.

Speaking of energy management, your, yeah. Score doubled from, you started at a three and

you went to a six. What led to that? What were some of the, the changes you made or specific things you worked on? 

Amy F.: The first thing I really worked on was rest and restoration what that meant for me was really setting some personal boundaries about hours that I would and would not work. It’s been difficult because there are challenges and I have to set up routines now to help me manage that. I am very strict about not working in evenings and not working on weekends so that I can be present with my family and recover time for myself that I need to rest and restore myself. I have an agreement with my colleagues that if something is truly urgent that I need to address immediately they send me a text message so that I know that I need to go and look at the email and do the thing Otherwise I don’t open it and I don’t look at it.

And so there’s still a way for me to engage when there’s something truly a priority, but gives me that space. I rearranged my work routine and my commute. So my commute was 45 minutes one way and through heavy traffic, and it was like soul sucking. And I just decided I need to do something different here because I’m coming in stressed.

I leave stressed, like it’s just terrible. So I shifted to using public transportation, which decreases my flexibility, but, immensely boosted my energy. I now have that time reclaimed where I can use it as quiet time to just hammer through some emails or read a book the morning commute in particular maximizes my time when I think most clearly, so I, if I have a difficult email I have to write or a difficult topic I have to engage in, I hold it until I’m sitting on the bus. In silence and I am fresh minded and I can do it. Then the last thing was prioritizing the workflow, right? I know I work better in the mornings, so actually designating more time in the mornings for focused work and trying to shift as much as possible meetings and other things to other times where I’m.

Less productive mentally, because that’s just not my style. 

Melody Wilding: What underlies all of this is respect for energy management because, we talk about you wanna prioritize energy management over time management we could spend 45 minutes commuting, but what we are able to accomplish or how we feel after that 45 minutes is vastly different depending on the decisions we make about how to utilize that time. The mindset we’re going into it with the story we’re telling ourselves about how we’re spending that time as well.

And so, and you also mentioned too that. Yeah, you would go into the day or end the day feeling drained. And for us as sensitive strivers, our nervous system, we have to be good stewards of our nervous system for better or worse, we are just more affected by what’s happening within us and around us.

We also talk about in the program how if we’re entering a situation with our emotional tank flooded or on empty it only takes little thing, like one little wrong glance and we’re like the rollercoaster begin.

So you made smart choices to resource yourself. More effectively it may sound like small changes like, oh, I, yes, I chose public transit over driving myself. But the ripple effect of that day after day after day is huge

That was, that was one thing I wanted to highlight. The second thing was. You talking about the boundaries with your, with your colleagues and saying, if it’s an emergency, text me again, seems very straightforward. But so often the sensitive strivers, we don’t do that because, no, yeah. The mental, yeah.

The mental gymnastics in our head are, well, will they think of me? Who am I to ask for this? Nobody else is doing that.

And a mistake we make with boundaries is we use negative framing. When we set boundaries. Often we say, I will not answer emails after this time instead, yeah, of what you did, which is if there is an emergency and an emergency.

Is defined by X, Y, Z. Text me. It is a affirmative boundary or rather, an expectation, an affirmative here is what to do when you need me. Not closed off. And so I just wanted to highlight those things.

Amy F.: I think you’re absolutely right. What I tell myself is,. I am available, not, I’m not available, . I am available and I will, there’s always exceptions. Like you end up with things and you’re like, well, I, I really need to do this actually. And sometimes there’s the thing nagging on my, and I’m able to be flexible with that, but not feel like I’m violating my boundary.

Now that I feel sure about it and I have a confidence because I’m honoring that commitment to myself, I feel like I can offer some flexibility when there needs to be,, just because I’m confident that I can go back to it. It’s practiced now.

I don’t feel like I’m gonna fall back into the, I’m gonna scramble mindset. 

Melody Wilding: Yes. And you were alluding to trusting yourself, trusting your instincts a bit more, and that was something you had said in your final reflections when you were graduating the program. You said, I trust my instincts now.

And you were referring to growth you had had in the decisiveness component. Are there specific moments that come to mind where you did trust yourself instead? Of second guessing yourself. 

Amy F.: My instincts now are trusting what I’m observing. . I know that. I’m, I have good discernment. I have good perception. I’m very good at being able to read the room and pick out the things that need to happen and pick out some details.

I trust that now because I realize that that’s the sensitive striver in me, and so being able to , draw some conclusions and be able to, work through whatever the Dyna dynamic is at the end I’m like, okay, I know I feel pretty good about this. I can trust that this is a pretty good assessment of the situation or what needs to happen next.

And I’ve started being more confident about just laying out, like in a project, okay, well here’s the next steps and here’s what they are. And also feeling more confident to ask for the feedback. Where am I? Missing these things are what do I need? What else is needed here? During the training, I was dealing with a particular personality, one of the, personalities you call a commander type.

I was really struggling to like figure out how to. Engage in a way that was productive and left me feeling as good as the other side felt right, like everybody had to feel good about the engagement,. I just decided I was gonna ask for feedback I was scared to do that, but I went ahead and trusted my instinct that at that particular moment what I needed to do was ask for that feedback and completely hear what they had to say

and I trusted also that I was gonna be able to debrief it with Wendy and you and the rest of the group. So that was helpful. That moment, shifted everything in that dynamic with that person it opened up a vulnerability that they respected. I was able to hear what was being said, and then in the debriefs I was able to

trust my instincts about what was needed next and brainstorm ideas about how to implement it. I feel much more confident about my ability to assess it, to utilize the tools in the toolbox and, to make the mistakes and be like

it is gonna be okay. The mistake is not gonna end everything. I can move on. So, yes. 

Melody Wilding: Yes. And you can recover the relationship, right? It’s not, there’s not this binary all or nothing. If I mess up, I’ve lost this forever. There is exactly that assuredness that, okay, that didn’t go as planned.

But I have the tools and I have the emotional capacity to see myself through this. I don’t have to catastrophize. You were, you were talking about, uh, and especially early on when you were discussing the transition to this, this new role and standing up this new team that, , dealing with different personalities, communication was the main area where the struggles were coming up for you.

Assertiveness was an area that tripled for you. So you went from a two to a six by the end of those 13 weeks. How has your approach to dealing with your colleagues, your management team, communications in general . How, for you, has that affected your level of, of influence you have within the organization?

Amy F.: In the past, what would happen is I would not want to be assertive, so I would be very passive and I would make suggestions I felt frustrated by the way that my influence was received. When I started trying to be more assertive about things, what I’ve discovered is that it took so much energy to just get me there. That I would just like. Woo, push it out and it would come off and it would sound harsher than I wanted it to sound. And I was trying to be unemotional, so I was like stripping it of emotion. So then it sounded very cold and I was like, this is not how I want to come off

because in person I could be very warm and goofy I can read the person well so what I started doing. In terms of communication was there was some like communication handouts, reframing feedback, which I actually use for not just feedback, but for like other things.

And thinking about, , how it’s being read if I was reading it right. So turning it around on me that now has. Shifted how things are coming across. ’cause I’m asking more questions I might be making suggestions, but I’m making them in a way that does include some assertive language, so I’m being a little more mindful about how I present it instead of just like pushing it out and making it land really hard.

The other piece of that was with this particular person that I was really struggling to communicate with what I changed was. How I communicate in person too. So instead of setting times which we have regular set up, catch up, time set, instead of saving up everything for that time, I started doing a quick drop in one topic, very short to the point, ask a question, get an answer, walk away, and there might be a little personal before and after sandwich sort of thing, but done.

And what I knew was this was being successful is when they started doing it to me and they’re reciprocating that and popping in and we’re getting stuff done. And now most of our interactions are in this what you could call a popcorn sort of thing, where we pop in and out and we get things done.

Recently we had one interaction that was extremely tense. Everybody was high energy and I was just coming in trying to get an answer very quickly. It got misunderstood. That came across and it was like this, very bad. All of us left feeling horrible, came back and we agreed. We talked through we were able to explain ourselves to each other, and then we came up with a code word because we assumed that this might happen in the future.

So their code word is ratchet. And so now if . One of us starts to feel like the emotions are just like getting out of control and that things are getting a little unwieldy. We’re just gonna say ratchet, and that way we both know we need to step back, take a break, whatever. And that was just a great success. Talk about managing up, like really being able to have this conversation and figure out what we both need and be able to both. Need that for each other. To me, that feels like a very big success. It’s a big win, 

Melody Wilding: big win. Also for, for you feeling like you can be more grounded and true to yourself in those situations because Yeah,, it’s so common that as sensitive strivers we’re having.

This dialogue and multiple conversations in our head, about what’s happening. We’re building this internal pressure and it takes so much activation energy then to have the conversation that we blurt it out, right? And we’re trying to be something we’re not, because we don’t wanna be perceived as overemotional or too empathetic and be a pushover.

And so all of that, it comes out more robotic. And rigid. Yes. Which then backfires even more and, yes, exactly. So it’s kind of like a pressure builds up, we just explode. It comes off in this stilted manner. It’s not perceived what you were referring to is within the program, we have tons and tons of different tools beyond the main curriculum where we’re, teaching these principles and strategies and concepts.

We’re so big on also giving you scripts and worksheets and also the live, the ongoing coaching to give you that feedback. And help you navigate that. I remember something you made a lot of use of was that guide to communicating with different styles. In that we provide, here’s word swaps to use.

If you’re dealing with someone who is a dominant personality, just make these few word swaps. You will stay, you’re still. Conveying the same message. Yes. But we wanna make sure that you’re not talking at each other or past each other, but that your message is actually landing with them. And that sounds like you were able to flex and find that sweet spot of I’m still me.

I still have my own style, but I can actually connect with this person to be heard and move the work forward and gain their respect and recognition and rapport, which make makes it less stressful for everyone involved. 

Amy F.: Well, the influence has shifted, um, because I am being seen as a leader in this space and. Beginning to see as a person who can facilitate communication between units, which is great. So the outcome of all of this has really been. One, some very positive movement forward where I’m getting feedback from others that they are noticing the difference in the communication style and my ability to move work forward in what feels like a much more collaborative way. I felt collaborative before just it didn’t come off that way. It feels like people are like being drawn back in I think I’m doing well with it and it’s being recognized because I’ve also been given additional responsibilities.

So the kinds of logistical and organizational, you know, put all the pieces together to help move this forward. That sort of work that I’m doing, I’m now doing for the broader administration as opposed to just my small group. Again, another challenge, but this time I felt up to the challenge I feel like I can walk into it with a lot less anxiety and nervousness because I know I have the tools, I have these resources

I am doing this rest and restoration. The key benefit from that is I have more creativity. I have time my brain can actually think about what to do and how, like where can I find more resources

Melody Wilding: . In, in one of your final reflections, you had this comment about. Moving towards creating environments for yourself rather than hoping other people create them for you. What are some of the ways you do that now or that you have advocated yourself that maybe didn’t feel possible before?

Amy F.: I wanted to work in an environment where people collaborate and the hierarchy is minimized and I think this is true about a lot of universities where we all see ourselves as part of a larger team that’s supporting a bigger mission. I like that in particular. ’cause I want to feel a part of something that’s beyond myself and my day-to-day work.

And I believe that other people do too. So rather than expecting it in this. Environment where I came in, where the culture didn’t really. Do that. I started thinking about, okay, instead of complaining to myself about this and what did I get myself into and all of that, like how can I move this forward to create this environment that I want?

I started small with my small team and figure out ways to begin building community in that space. Then the next little space, and then the next little space and the next thing you know . Feeling like I am in that community and that sort of work environment.

Because as you do those things and people feel welcomed, they also respond positively to that. , The other one is the peace and quiet. Like even this is like focus, like a little bit rest. Like I need less, fewer distractions. So my office, I’ve made sure that it’s very calm and I have little ear things that I put in to minimize , outside noise when I need to focus.

, So it’s just little things to create the environment that I need to function the best. I think maybe why. My decision making and the balanced goal setting and all of that sort of is better, is because I’m thinking more about what I need and how I can meet that need as opposed to waiting for someone else to do it for me, or expecting my supervisor or expecting , the university or you know, whatever to do it.

Does that make sense? 

Melody Wilding: Oh, absolutely. Yeah. There’s greater agency there. As we’re wrapping up here, you’ve mentioned some of the things you took advantage of in the program and that,, one of the reasons you joined was because you were looking for something comprehensive, but what were some of your favorite parts of the program?

What did you find most valuable , for you to actually make all these changes? Oh, 

Amy F.: okay. I, well, huge list. I’ll try to narrow it down. As an educator and being involved in education, I was really paying attention to the modes of , the teaching and like the co the program and all of that.

And as someone who wants to learn, I needed also very busy and a single parent. I had to have it be flexible. So first off, it was the, the. Of, of learning that we’re both in person, virtual engaged and also asynchronous. Being able to sit down in my own time and do the lessons and look at the book and make the notes that was.

That with the flexibility, I didn’t have to show up to a space and sit there for four hours for x number of weeks and, not be able to meet other needs. Second thing was, um, I really liked the cohort, the idea of a cohort learning with other people. The conversations that we had were, I think sometimes where I got the most each week because hearing other people talk through what they were learning.

Really helped me. It did less affirming of my own thoughts and more of like shedding light to put more, , clarity on what I was seeing. Right.

During the course of it, it was another layer of accountability where, you know, you could pop on, somebody would be there if you had an issue, you could talk through it right then. , And it made you feel like you were doing it together.

I didn’t experience the isolation that I was experiencing before, and now in going back to like creating that environment, I’ve realized how valuable that is and I’m able to. Create that for myself here as well, so that I also still don’t experience that isolation.

And then the resources, I mean, gosh, I downloaded all the resources. I still come back to those. I still look through them.

I find over time. What I’m focusing on is different because your strive diagnostic, you shift and so it’s not a one and done. I think that’s what’s really nice about your program is that you acknowledge that and you recognize that people are gonna keep coming back to it. And it’s very a generous.

Space to be in. So 

Melody Wilding: I appreciate you sharing all of that. ’cause especially over , the last five years, resilient is my baby. I consider it my university for sensitive drivers. And we’ve , tried to put so much thought and care into how it’s structured and I really appreciate you saying I’m someone who’s busy.

I have a demanding job, I have a demanding life and. Look at what I was still able to accomplish because yeah, so many of us, and I’m, I’m guilty of this in my own life in certain ways. We say, I’ll get to this when, or I’ll wait till the summer or I’ll wait till this, that’s tempting, but I, I don’t know if anybody listening is like me.

It never gets less busy. No, but 

Amy F.: the work is always there. 

Melody Wilding: Exactly. The future, the future of, oh, it will be better when never seems to quite come yet. Some of these things continue to amplify and why continue to struggle? I think , for anyone who tends to tell themselves that story of, I’ll wait, whatever it is,.

Look out for that , and question that for yourself. Yeah. And, and also I appreciate you saying the, the flexibility that , this is a program built for someone like you who is busy. . Who works long hours, a long week. It is meant to fit into your life, not be this. Other burden that, oh, I have to go do that course.

We try really hard to make sure that the format is flexible, that you can asynchronously watch the weekly lessons. If you do have to miss a call here and there, you can catch up on the podcast. It’s no problem. There’s that flexibility, but also what we’re teaching you is meant to integrate. Into optimizing your day-to-day interactions and how you’re moving through your work differently.

We’re not asking you to take three hours out of your day to journal or do a meditation because we know that it’s not realistic for you. . I appreciate you saying that. For the person who may be feeling like, Ugh, this sounds interesting, but I don’t think I have time for it. Amy, thank you so much for everything you have shared today.

I was telling you before we hit record, that it’s always one thing for people to hear from me or Wendy about the program, what’s included, and what’s possible. It’s very different thing to hear from a real. Person, someone that the listener can see themselves in and be like, oh my gosh, that is me.

And it just opens up such a sense of possibility for other people. So any parting words, anything you would like to share with the person who is maybe considering joining Resilient or doing this work for themselves? What, what would you tell them? 

Amy F.: If you feel like you’re a busy person, you’re going to need to, make time for it.

But what I found is that by implementing the things as we went along, the time was easier because I was learning things as I went and my energy was shifting and there was a nice bit of accountability. I’m the kind of person that I have to. Have someone expecting me to show up in order to show up. It’s like I have to meet someone at the gym, so I’ll go.

So you just know that there’s someone meeting you at the gym and,, and that they’re gonna be gracious there and you’re gonna be able to really learn and the story isn’t done , that’s the nice thing about this. What I feel excited and energized about even just from this conversation is I realize how far I’ve come and I know that that’s not the end of the story.

And I’ve got more to come and it’s gonna be, it’s gonna be good.