Take back control of your time, rewire your digital habits, and live a more balanced life in just 30 days
Tell me if you’ve ever had the following experience. While you’re working on an important project, you find yourself on Facebook or Twitter. Notice that you “find yourself” there — you’re not really sure how it happened. You scroll through your feed, and every time you reach the bottom a new set of posts loads that you haven’t seen, so you keep browsing — until you look up at the clock.
That’s when it hits you. Your stomach sinks when you notice an hour has gone by, and you’re overwhelmed by the emptiness of never feeling “caught up” and loss that you’ll never get that time back, when all you really wanted to do was get more done!
Or has this ever happened to you? You unlock your phone, see the email app, and even though you don’t want to click on it, you still do.
When you’re no longer in full control of your actions and your impulses are determining your behavior, it’s a sign of addiction.
Unfortunately the internet’s ever-increasing role in our daily lives makes these situations more and more common. But if you think back to your happiest and most fulfilling memories, they’re probably not from when you were in front of a screen. Meaningful, precious moments are only possible when we disconnect from our devices, reconnect with each other, and recharge our mental energy.
That’s exactly what REWIRE will help you do.
The 4-step cycle of digital addiction
Based on my experience working with top-performing female entrepreneurs and executives around the world, and my years of training in cognitive behavior and addiction as a licensed therapist with a Masters from Columbia, I’ve identified a four-step negative feedback loop that is the underlying cause of our technology addictions.
The cycle starts with our uncontrollable impulse to check our inbox and social profiles — that experience of being in your email or on Facebook without even realizing that you opened the page.
Once there, we then go into a frenzy of reaction. We impulsively respond to emails, watch videos, and engage with content in our newsfeeds, all without really being aware or in control of what we’re doing.
During the course of our mindless technology and social media binge, we are bombarded by the best-of-the-best highlights from our friends’ lives. Even though we may know intellectually that we’re only seeing tiny snapshots of the high points of their day, it still makes us feel like we’re inadequate and not as successful as the rest of our peers by comparison.
In order to combat this negative self-perception, we either search for validation as a way to feel good about ourselves again or simply try to numb our emotions all together with escapism. When it comes to validation seeking, we often post to social media hoping that each like, favorite, and comment soothes us and makes us feel some sense of self-confidence again. Unfortunately this leads right back to compulsively checking our social pages, and the cycle begins again.
Ending the downward spiral
REWIRE is designed to demolish the self-destructive patterns that are a part of each step in the cycle of digital addiction and replace them with empowering habits that will enable you to get back to having a healthy relationship with technology.
Over the course of 30 days, you’ll learn practical strategies based the latest behavior change and cognitive psychology research to:
- Overcome your tech obsession
- Squash procrastination
- Eliminate negative self-perception from comparison and doubt
- Regain composure and control of your online interactions
By the end of the course, you’ll once again be able to connect with your friends on social media without getting “sucked in” to your newsfeed, leave your phone in your bag and be fully present while you’re out to dinner with your significant other, and generally be the master of your devices instead of a slave to them.
Please note this digital detox is not about deprivation. I think it’s unrealistic to go completely tech-free in our hyperconnected world, and having that expectation will only set you up for failure. Instead, our goal is to help you find a happy medium — so that you’re in control of your technological behavior instead of always being in “react” mode.
I won’t lie to you and say that confronting your tech addiction will be easy, but I can promise you that regaining control of your time, relationships, and emotions will be well worth the effort.
How the 30-day REWIRE course works
Twice a week for one month you’ll receive an email with actionable, research-backed strategies for breaking your tech addiction. You’ll also receive a workbook to log your progress and support you in your journey over the 30-day course.
Week 1 is all about breaking down and stopping the impulses that lead you to compulsively check your inbox and social pages. If you can put better habits in place here, all of the other problems of digital addiction become easier to manage.
In Week 2, we’ll turn our attention to how you can manage your responses when you do check your email and social profiles. Email and social media are great ways for people to connect with each other, so no one’s saying you should stop using them completely. But after you’ve taken control of when you check, the next step becomes making sure your bad habits don’t take over and send you into a frenzy of uncontrolled reactions once you’re there.
Week 3 switches the focus to addressing the emotional side of checking email and social media. Too often it leads to feelings of negative self-image and fear of missing out. Particularly with social media, everyone else only posts the highlights from their day, and that often leads to an endless stream of glamorous selfies, vacation pictures, and success stories that can leave you feeling like a failure by comparison.
Finally, in Week 4 we’ll address the validation seeking and escapism that often follows as a result of the negative feelings that we covered in Week 3. To combat these emotions, it’s common for people to go to social media with their own posts seeking the validation and self-esteem boosts that come from getting likes, favorites, and comments. But then you constantly want to see how many you got, and it leads right back to impulsively checking your digital media — and the cycle begins again. The negative feelings from Week 3 can also lead to escapist behavior, like binge watching Netflix or excessive partying, so we’ll cover those responses as well.
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